just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
