she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
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