More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
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