I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
