he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize
