white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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