I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
