Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize