when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize