i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
