I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful