My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize