why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
