Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
