VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
