Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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