I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
