She is in my trunk
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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