Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
