idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
You almost got us killed.
YOUβRE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
