Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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