Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
