Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
