"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
