Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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