It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
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Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
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just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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