The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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