that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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