I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize