Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't notice because vodka
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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