It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
