I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
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