i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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