On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize