After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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