omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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