D3 body, D1 cock
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
