New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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