so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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