Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
