Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
