did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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