Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize