I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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