WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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