If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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