just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
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that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
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She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.