After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I love you. Go after that dick
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize