So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
