Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize