C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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